Today was hard, not harder than the past couple weeks, but hard.

I should be happy, I am with an amazing man, we’ve just bought the home of our dreams, and really, I am doing well.

But, the problem is, I feel overcome with an unbelieveable sense of something in my heart. I don’t know what it is.

Ever since I was laid off in April, and subsequently took the job at Company B, something has been missing. I LOVED my job at Company A. LOVED IT. I did things, I produced results – I could draw a line between revenue and programs that I ran. But, I understood – it’s business – Company A didn’t need me anymore. Sad? Sure! I hated it! Miss them – Absolutely!! Would I go back – DUH! But, here, I am offered this contract position at B, just a few days after I left A, that was all sunshine and lollipops – I travel! I eat! I drink fancy wines! Sounds fabulous right? Yeah…Not so much. I felt like I used to, well, it really sounds obnoxious to say make a difference. But, I used to have a say about what went on. I could decide if we placed banner ads on option A or option B. But, now, I only get to decide, NOTHING. That is right – nothing… I am SO proud of where I have gone in my career, but, where I am? Not so proud!

Anyway, not sure what I am saying here, but needed to get some stuff off my chest.

And, just to let you all know. I am not getting paid regularly, nor am I getting reimbursed timely for $1635.35 in travel expenses.

- frustrated rhi

House!! OURS!!
Originally uploaded by RhiRhi.

See this house? I think we just bought it.

More to follow…need to stop hyperventilating…

The wonderful Shelli from Hydrangeas are Pretty has asked the following of me.

1) Are you from Portland, or a transplant? (and if FROM – what high school did you go to?)

So, technically, I am not from Portland proper. I grew up in Canby, Oregon. If you don’t know where that is, it’s about 15 – 20 minutes South of Portland. They have the best pumpkin patches there in the world.

2) What was the coolest toy at the Toy Hall of Fame in Rochester?

I really loved seeing all the vintage toys. There were some beautiful dolls there that remind me a lot of the dolls that my grandma has that I wasn’t allowed to touch as a little girl.

3) How was your NYC Trip? And why didn’t you call me!

My NYC trip was amazing, but so tiring, I’d love to come back one day when I have a little time to myself to explore. But, we did have an “adventure” in seach of a Staples Store. I promise I’ll call next time! I didn’t even have time this trip to eat a hot dog. I always make time for Hot Dogs!!
4) What’s the best and worst part about being an auntie?

Hmmm, there are so many wonderful things about being an auntie. I think the best part about it is it allows me to see life through the eyes of a little person. It truly makes me excited to be a parent one day. My nieces are two of the most hilarious little girls I have ever met. Alana is a monkey and should really wear a helmet and Angelina is such a petite little charmer. Somedays I am amazed that they are even related to one another.

The worst part is that sometimes I really don’t want to let them go, their parents are very young and sometimes don’t make the best decisions in raising them. I know at this point, all I can do is bite my tongue and make sure I give them the best of me when I am with them. Usually it involves a bath and a trip to Target for clean socks. But, it also includes hugs, kisses, reading books, and just letting them know how much their Ni Ni loves them.
5) If YOU could be on a Reality TV show, which one would it be, and why?

NERD ALERT!!! I love the Pillsbury Bake Off Show on Food Network. I dream about concocting something yummy and pretty to enter in to that so I can be on that show.

Yay! That was fun Shelli!!!

If you want to play too, leave me a comment saying “interview me.” The first five commenters will be the participants.

* I will respond by asking you five questions.
* You will update your blog/site with the answers to the questions.
* You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the same post.
* When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.